Friday, December 28, 2012

As I reflect about old timey things that I miss, like... books (:/), it occurs to me this is probably a rather weird position for a star trek fan. Boldly going... into the past! Basically it boils down to I WANT THE TV FUTURE, NOT THIS ONE. In the technology-based TV future young people are interested in science and space exploration. In this future, they use technology for... sexting.

I find watching Star Trek in all its incarnations very relaxing. There's something zen about it to me, probably because it's the future and there's a federation and people are actually trying to get along with each other. Kind of gives me some hope. And I like all the technology, I'm not anti-technology at all. It's just... books. And records. And photographs. There's a realness there that the digital version just can't replace. Technology should enhance humanity, not replace it.

Now I realize books aren't sentient or even living beings and being sad about them isn't logical (yes i'm channeling Vulcans for a moment), but human beings are sentient... mostly (hi fox and friends!)... and I feel that we need things to stimulate our senses. And that's what digital everything takes away from us, the ability to experience things with all of our senses, particularly touch. So god yes, give us medical tricorders and universal translators and warp drives, but leave us books. Because humanity is in what we do and the choices we make and how we treat others, but it's also in how we experience things.

And - this is where the TV Future gets it wrong - this lack of tactile experiences leads us to be desensitized to other people and our surroundings in general. I mean, I see this happening so much already, and it scares me. Just look at... well, pretty much anyone under 25. I'm afraid of a not-so-distant future where no one remembers books or records at all, because everyone who's 25+ now is gone. So I'm here to at least leave a written report that there were once things called books, kids. Maybe it'll catch on one day in the future as "retro."
Why I don't read the news:

Every once in a while I go to the old yahoo news page to check in with the world. I like to know who's died; this is a weird obsession of mine. If a famous person has died, I want to know about it. So today I check in. General Schwartzkopf (probably horribly misspelled, sorry) has died. The first president Bush is recovering in the hospital. Okay, these are things I want to know. Duly noted.

Then - god help me - I let my eyes slowly wander down the page, and I'm reminded why I never read the news. "Shark explodes in mall!" "Woman on bus bench set on fire!" And I'm not even shocked by these things, I'm just reminded. "Oh yeah, that's why I watch youtube and play clan lord all day. Righto." And then I try to scrub the... burning sharks and exploding women from my mind, because they really have no place in there.
I feel so good right now. I haven't felt this much like myself in a long time. I think it's probably a sign of good health if you feel happiest when you feel most like yourself, even if it involves ripping on other people a little bit. ;p It's honest, and honesty really is the way to go. Bring able to express truth in exactly the way you want to express it, that is just the best feeling.

I just wish ONE PERSON would read this bloody thing!
Okay! One more rant about what was almost entirely a great trip, because while I'm experiencing all the joy and whatnot, these unexpressed annoyances dig into me like an itchy shirt tag. So this is me ripping out the tag, and then I will post some good stuff. Though honestly I find this stuff good too, in a perverse way, because it's cathartic, and it's easier to be humorous about pain for some reason. I think that's why I rarely post about the good times. They're just not funny. They're people posting on twitter with lots of exclamation marks or posting a 0_0 yay! photo on one of those photo sites, instabooth or whatever. so yeah.

I met some new people over the holiday, namely my husband's father, stepmother, two of her children, and one of their spouses. All perfectly nice people. My husband's father is straight out of a Woody Allen movie, and the way he and his wife interact, perfect. They're adorable and I've never seen a real life Woody Allen movie before, like unscripted, in a living room, but there it was. So yeah, thoroughly enjoyed.

Now for some reason, I've always gotten along better with older people, like my parents' age. It's not that I really have more in common with them or anything, I just feel more comfortable with them. Maybe because I'm not expected to have a lot in common with them, because of the generation difference, I can just relax and be myself. And they tend to appreciate people being themselves more, because they've seen more of life or whatever. but anyway. This brings me to my peer group, we'll say roughly the 28-45 age range. Except for my husband, I have found that across the board I HAVE NOTHING IN COMMON WITH THESE PEOPLE.

I believe I ranted about this same thing 10 YEARS AGO on this very blog, how I was forced into a gathering of 20s-30s folks who talked about NOTHING but their jobs, back and forth and crosswise and at great length, for the duration of the night. Now here is a news flash for you all that you apparently don't know: YOUR JOB IS BORING TO EVERYONE BUT YOU. I don't care what it is, with perhaps a few unlikely exceptions*, IT'S BORING.

So everyone talks about their boring job like it's the most exciting thing in the world back and forth the whole night, and me being the only one in this age range who is not officially "employed," I have jack to say. Not only do I have jack to say, I don't WANT to have anything to say. I want to be in a different conversation entirely. I enjoy being a homemaker, but I'm not so deluded I think everyone wants to hear about it at length. A quick cupcake recipe exchange, perhaps. Yet I am forced to listen to everyone else's daily grind in grueling detail, and I am SICK of it. I much prefer the company of retired people. They actually have things to say.

*exceptions including: if you are JK Rowling, Quentin tarantino, the QB for the Packers, or Paul McCartney.
Janeane Garofalo standup from 2012:

And what does she go after back to back, like BLAM! BLAM!? Every kid being named MADISON, and the suspicious abundance of "food allergies!" YES! I haven't felt this connected to the universe since seriously, like the mid 90s. She said something like, "when I was in school, before kids were named Madison." This would be a good way to measure time I think, BM and AM.

So yeah, feels good. Maybe no one reads my blog, but by god, Janeane's still out there fighting the good fight against human ridiculousness.

Thursday, December 27, 2012

AAAAAAAAAAAAH the I CLAIM THIS FOR SPAIN guy replied to me on youtube! He was really cool and gave me a smiley face! I love that he was like out there sitting at a computer and my message about how great it was to hear his act again reached him, like a little time capsule from 1991. Awesome.

So hi, I just got back from vacation! I had a great Christmas, but that's not really what I talk about here. That's what you write on twitter, and I don't have twitter, so that's convenient. Anyway, good times. But I'm here to rant. Because this is my rant filter. I could have the best time ever, but there's inevitably something that needs to be ranted about, and this is where it ends up.

SO I basically just spent Christmas in a Woody Allen movie. Which is awesome. But here's the rant part. When, exactly, did people STOP BEING ABLE TO EAT FOOD?

I can eat whatever the fook I want. I'll get FAT, but I can eat it. I don't eat onions, because they're disgusting. But now there're all these people who are vegan and gluten free and lactose intolerant and.... I dunno, sugar unshackled? cut loose from the cupcake oppressors? This is all a very modern concept. There was not a gluten free menu in caveman times, or during WWII, or even when I was growing up in the 80s. So what exactly happened to make this necessary? People are just like fragile little snowflakes now, aren't they?

When I was a kid I ate EVERYTHING and I never wore a helmet or got submerged in sanitizer after playing outside and I'M FINE. But now, apparently people will die if they eat bread. So there's this pile of food with no cheese or milk or flour or you know, food in it, and it tasted ok but I'm like, if I had to be around these dietary restriction people all the time I would LOSE MY FREAKING MIND. Dear god, please don't let my kids have any of this crap. I think I can will them not to have it with the power of my mind, through sheer force of OUR FOREFATHERS ATE FLOUR AND SO CAN YOU. What the hell HAPPENED to us man??

My answer is now, as it was then, "C is for cookie, that's good enough for me."
What I'm saying is, we all have different levels of intelligence, but at least try to be smart. Don't be willfully ignorant. Just think for yourself. Think with your TV off.
See, I just want to go back to when things were FUN. Remember... fun?

I've been trying to pinpoint the day the fun died. Having just been through an airport, the obvious answer is 9/11. And yeah, 9/11 was pretty much the death of freedom and the American way of life, but that's another story. Then I went back to the late 90s, when Britney Spears first crawled out from whatever lichen-covered rock she spawned under. But no, that came AFTER. That was merely the next link in the everything's-getting-worse chain. I have, in fact, pinpointed it down to the exact date: October 7th, 1996, the day Fox News was launched on an unsuspecting public.

To discuss the politics of Faux News is missing the point. What needs to be discussed is the attitude, and the way so many people react to it. The Faux News morning show, which so many people start their day with (scary, huh?) is basically a group of people who think in blips and sound bytes. There's no room for subtleties or discrepancies. No irony. No moments of self-enlightenment. It's the I-Already-Know-What-I-Think network. And they want to hear what you think, sure, but only so they can wait for the GOTCHA! moment. The moment they can somehow twist what you say, in their little narrow tube of a brain, into what they want you to have said. Something you will never hear on fox news: "Oh yeah, I see your point." It's this extremely unenlightened way of being, like human nature boiled down to its sad little core before we invented the wheel or thinking or anything. It's like waiting for evolution to start.

And I think the reason its so popular is because most people also Already Know What They Think, and somehow this attitude becomes justified by seeing it on TV. "Hey look Martha, that guy in a suit is saying just what I've always known! SCORE!" And then somehow it becomes fact, and everyone who opposes it is a... Communist, or something. Which is weird, because this kind of social censorship is about the most un-American thing I can think of. It's like "freedom of speech... wink wink, nudge nudge." It's the willfully stupid leading the actually stupid. Which is dangerous.

Inspired by one of my previous posts, I've been watching a lot of early 90s standup lately and it's been very life-affirming. I discovered the guy who took his microphone stand and declared, "I CLAIM THIS FOR SPAIN" in a silly accent which is something I still say ALL THE TIME, silly accent and all, even after i forgot where it came from. I love how we're all just a collection of random stuff we've heard.

But anyway. This lead me to watching some Janeane Garofalo clips and one was on the Fox morning "news" show. Basically it was this:

JG: I'm against the Iraq war for these reasons.
FOXTARD: Saddam Hussein must love you!

Um... WHAT?? Yeah, he actually said that. And this is how the majority of Americans who watch news get their news (I hope and pray the rest get it from the Daily Show). I mean, you walk into any random establishment in America and what is the default news channel they have on? It's ALMOST ALWAYS FOX. Try it, you'll see. It's like, they're scared to watch anything else or something. If we don't watch Fox News we'll be attacked by terrorists or all spontaneously turn into communists, or something. I don't know. I don't know how people can stand to be condescended to and have their worst nature constantly justified, but for whatever reason it seems to work.

What I'm saying is, I DON'T HATE FOX NEWS BECAUSE I'M LIBERAL. I hate it because it's idiotic and pandering and a lie and it hurts our country by misinforming people and then getting them all riled up over what they've been misinformed about.

And so, that was the day the fun died. And probably lots of other stuff too. But I am here to reject this self-perpetuating paranoia and fear and have some damn fun. I CLAIM THIS FOR SPAIN.

Thursday, December 20, 2012


I'm not sure which is worse, that unholy abomination of a name or her foul-mouthed bitchface Barbie of a coach.

Aww yeah, T&T is back!!
LA would still be pretty great if it wasn't for all the people.

I bought these two tops in a fit of homesickness (also, cute! squee!) Yeah, part of me will always be home in LA no matter how godawful clusterfooked it gets. I kind of wish I could have told CA I love it one last time. I guess I did though, really. My mom and I did tons of classic stuff before I left. Including - and I didn't even know it at the time!! - the Japanese Gardens in the valley that is also Starfleet Academy! I just learned this watching a Voyager episode with mah hubby. This made me so happy in ways I can't even describe. Those gardens were the last place my mom and I visited before I left. Being part of Star Trek, they're kind of always part of me now too, in that great way pop culture belongs to everyone. *hugs tight*

We're going to Vancouver for Christmas! I think I'm gonna love it there, as long as it stops raining long enough to let me. We're even - hopefully- gonna check out some gardens. Not Starfleet Academy, but not stuck inside behind a snowpile either!! I can't wait!

Wednesday, December 19, 2012

I really like the song Video Games by Lana del Rey. This song is like, the anti-call me maybe. Not only is it meaningful, vulnerable and authentic, it's beautiful to listen to and does something very rare - takes me back to a place in time before the song actually existed. In this case, LA in the 90s. I listen and feel nostalgic, which is weird, but also very cool.

So great job, lana del rey, for making one of only like 5 non-country songs from post- 2000 that I have on my itunes. It's probably produced as hell like everything else, but it doesn't FEEL produced like all that other crap (Britney Justin Rae Jepson Minaj West, etc), and these days I'll take feel. Feel is good.

The past is like... all these little pieces of yourself falling off, and knowing you'll never get them back. It's like getting a blood transfusion, but the new blood is ketchup. Somehow, this song makes me feel a little better about all that. Sort of the same way I enjoy walking through cemetaries, even though I'm not goth. I can't help it. I look forward to the past like it's the future.

"the new blood is ketchup" is totally my new... something.
In case there's any question why I prefer nostalgia to so much of today's nonsense... apparently it is now offensive to use the phrase "Merry Christmas." No, not "f*uck you," not "eat sh*t and die," but MERRY EFFIN CHRISTMAS. Yes, "happy holidays" is a better greeting because it includes people who celebrate Hanukkah and other holidays, I totally get that. But to say that the phrase MERRY CHRISTMAS is actually OFFENSIVE to your friggin sensibilities is another thing entirely. What has happened to us, exactly, as humans? This is not the world we used to live in.

Merry Christmas!
Yeah, f*ck you too!

Pardon me while I go bury myself in Norman Rockwell prints and cry.

I mean, since when does celebrating christmas necessarily mean you're Christian? It's been a secular holiday for a long time now. There would not be an actual inflatable snowman industry if it was all christian, there would not be Tigger dancing with Mickey Mouse in 30 foot snowglobes on at least one lawn on every block, it would be nativity scenes or NOTHIN, you heathens. ALL the greeting cards would be religious instead of the one little religious rack in Hallmark among the 10,000 Santa Claus ones. I'm not Christian, and I celebrate Christmas in my own way. I love it, in fact. I love decorating, and baking, and singing carols, and Christmas dinner with family, and you don't have to be christian or anything else to appreciate the SPIRIT of that. I sort of see it as "Happy December, have a cookie shaped like a tree!"

I mean, as long as you're not saying Merry Christmas to a RABBI or something, it's a pretty far stretch to consider it insulting. The funniest part is, the person who's all OMGOFFENDED isn't even Jewish or anything but an ATHEIST. Um, you don't believe in anything, and you expect the rest of the world to just shrivel up and not believe in anything either? What kind of world do you want to live in exactly, one that's just sanitized of EVERYTHING you don't believe in? I have nothing against atheism UNTIL they try to um, preach it to others? Anyone else's irony meter just go from red to like, purple? Or whatever colors irony is measured in? Somehow purple strikes me as HIGH IRONY ALERT. anyway.

We preach so much "tolerance" these days that we've out-toleranced ourselves right out of everything. Because not everyone can have their way, and sometimes "merry christmas" just needs to bloody win. Because it's NICE, and it makes most people happy, and instead of working up into a big offendy froth why not try to take something nice from it for yourself? Surely there's something about the idea of christmas you like? Pretty lights? Jingling bells? The smell of fresh pine? The glow of a candle? Giving to others? RUDOLPH?? And if not... well, you're just kind of a sad person and I don't want to live in your world, thanks.

Tuesday, December 18, 2012

If you spill a bit of rather expensive alcohol on the counter and lick it off, are you:

A: frugal
B: an alcoholic
C: a frugal alcoholic?

I don't know, but I did it and I'm not ashamed.

I'm on a total late 80s/early 90s kick right now. Man, I forgot what a good time that was musically. I made a playlist of favorite songs from the tapes I listened to obsessively- the Sundays, the Connells, Darling Buds, 10,000 Maniacs, and Julee Cruise (the twin peaks music). Takes me right back. I lived in Redondo Beach then and walked to the South bay Galleria all the time, back when there was a Robinsons May and not EVERY SINGLE dept store was a Macy's, and enjoyed a teriyaki beef bowl at the food court. My other favorite walking destinations were El Indio Mexican restuarant (still there, woo! so good!), the row of thrift stores, some random chinese restuarant, and of course the ubiquitous video store, which I do believe happened to be the one Quentin Tarantino worked at before he became the god of movie making. He might have even helped me check out Pretty Woman for the 20th time!!

So yeah, good times.

I was also really obsessed with comedy back then. I even took a stand up comedy class and performed a little routine lol. Weird, because like popular music, I pretty much hate comedy now. It's mostly just profanity and trying to shock people. I like my comedy to have, y'know, humor in it. So yeah... another obsession fallen by the wayside. Though I would still kill to see Jerry Seinfeld or David Letterman. And I remember a very young Jon Stewart before anyone knew who he was (OMG I'm a comedy hipster). I probably saw him at the Laugh Factory or one of those places. Yeah, I used to go to comedy clubs as a teenager with my mom. Looking back it seems kind of cool. Not dorky at all. Shut up. Anyway, I also remember very young Janeane Garofalo. I loved her because she wore those flowered dresses, tights and boots like me and talked about being intimidated by 'the obligatory hip asian woman' at clothing boutiques. We need more humor like that. Now she's all political and stuff. And no more flowered dresses.

Hopefully my humor still comes through in here sometimes. :)

EDIT: Video Archives, where Tarantino worked, was actually on Sepulveda and not walk-to-able, which means it was a different video store I walked to. However, I know I had membership there, which means my mom would have driven me. Which means my mom might have also met Quentin Tarantino. Which is even more awesome. This would have been around 1990, so the time period is right. Odds are, we were in the Presence of Greatness.

Monday, December 17, 2012

Okay, one more thing about extroverts. You notice how they almost always like, know the same stuff? At the same time? This goes way beyond conformity, it's some kind of 'people person' mind meld. Like some song will come on the radio, and they all know it and sing along. Okay, maybe it's a popular song but... these are the kind of people who DECIDE what's popular. And I'm like, how do they all reach this unspoken consensus of what they know, and like?

Because I think this isn't people trying to 'fit in,' but some natural phenomena. And then people like me either try to 'fit in' or... not. I guess this is where the phrase 'offbeat' comes from. The people who don't sing along with what everyone else is singing. And then you have hipsters who get off on knowing stuff 'no one has heard of' (except other hipsters i guess) which is really even more conformist because they're trying too hard. I don't feel like the other kind of people really have to 'try' at all, which is what's so confusing to me about it. They have a kind of instinct I'm lacking I guess.
Also! I have had this blog for TEN YEARS! woooohoooooo!! *blows blowy party favor thing* So nice to have some consistency in this crazy world of action.

To celebrate, I'm making a list of things that are actually better than they were 10 years ago, or stuff I love that wasn't around then. Because there actually are some!

1. MY HUSBAND. duh. Everything i ever wanted, I found it.

2. OUR KITTY. My mom still has the kitty I had 10 years ago too!

3. YOUTUBE. I ignore a lot of 'modern' stuff, like twitter and whatever, but I love youtube! Youtube serves as both a time capsule and a way to find other people who are really passionate about stuff you're into. And not just stuff you think of when you think of stuff people are into, like movies or basketball or harry potter, but obscure stuff you didn't even know had a 'scene' like exploring abandoned places. So yeah. Youtube has definitely made me more me, and I like that.

4. Three of my all time favorite TV shows! Big bang theory, American horror story, and Haven. Big bang theory replaced the hole in my heart that battlebots left behind. Oh and Trueblood! TV is very good right now.

5. Some really great country music! Miranda Lambert/Pistol Annies, Zac Brown Band, and lots of great songs. This almost makes up for other kinds of music completely sucking now.*

6. As much as I bemoan the loss of 80s/90s fashion, I have some REALLY cute clothes from American Eagle, etc. Very happy fashion wise right now.

7. 10 years ago I had absolutely no direction in my life. I was drifting along like a tumblin' tumbleweed. Today I'm married, and I bake muffins for my hubby and feel generally good and purposeful. I'm suffering through a very bad winter in canada right now, and feeling a bit homesick, but I have a lot of blessings to count.

8. My ipod? Ok, I am torn on this one! I absolutely love my ipod/itunes, it's like creating your own radio playlist or having an endless mixtape you never have to rewind. awesome, yes? But! a part of me perversely misses cassettes, lps, etc. Just because they seemed more real and I loved the album cover art of the 80s and I like stuff you can actually TOUCH in this age of digital everything and I sort of want the best of both worlds I guess. But yeah, I love my ipod. I just kind of want record stores back too...

*sidenote: My hubby asked me the other day if I liked Taylor Swift and I said yes, but she's becoming less country and more poppy. And he says, she's an opium addict? tee hee.

So yes! That's my list of mostly positive thoughts interspersed with random me-ness. Life is generally good right now, not so much in the middle of winter but in the overall picture, things have worked out well. I've finally gone from 'when is anything ever gonna happen?!' to 'I'm here. I made it.'

So. I try to take being super-shy in stride as much as possible. It sucks, but I am who I am and I don't want to ruin my life dwelling on it. BUT. Sometimes I see non-shy people just having so much fun doing things I can't do, or rather doing them in a way I can't do them (like, talking/connecting with people, even random strangers), and they just look like they're having SO MUCH MORE FUN than me when I do the same things. And I get jealous. It's a senseless waste of energy, but I can't help it sometimes. It just seems unfair I have to miss out on these big chunks of life. Usually, if I don't like something, I'd try to change it. But I can't change being shy no matter what I do. It's just how I am. It would be like trying to change my eyes from brown to blue to become outgoing. I just wish there was a way for shy people to have AS MUCH FUN as extroverted people in a given situation. Then I wouldn't be so jealous, if I didn't feel like I was missing out on anything.

I think the worst part is how the extroverted people take it for granted so much. :/ Like what, isn't this how everybody is? Um no... not everybody.

So yeah, a little update from the forgotten minority of introverts. Or maybe we're not even the minority, maybe we're the majority but nobody knows because the extroverts TAKE UP ALL THE SPACE.

And DAMMIT, I hate how people who go on violent rampages are always described as 'quiet.' You're not helping our cause here people! Why can't, just once, one of these maniacs be described as 'loud and obnoxious, like gilbert gottfried on steroids.' Quiet people get enough of a bad rap, god. :(

Also: shy people with social anxiety are NOT mentally ill, unless they also have schizophrenia or something like that. Mentally ill means you can't think rationally or control yourself or are disconnected from reality, not that you have difficulty doing something. We're sane, we just struggle with something a lot of people don't struggle with. So please, media, stop talking about shyness like it's a mental illness, there's obviously something bigger going on with someone who would go on a shooting rampage.

Just had to get that off my chest.
Ah, blessed normalness. A Christmas card from my mom!!

Friday, December 14, 2012

Every time a senseless shooting happens, there are always two responses.

1. OMG we really need to do something about gun control you guys!! And then... nothing happens. The shock wears off and politicians go back to arguing over the same old crap.

2. OMG what we need is MOAR GUNS!! Sure, cause two guns always make a right... or something. :/

I say, LESS TALK MORE ROCK. What's it going to take to see there's a real problem here? Gun control is only the tip of the iceberg. What is it that's making so many young men go so horribly WRONG that they want to shoot lots of people? Where is this anger coming from? And why is it so OVERLOOKED by the people who know them?!

I think people are looking less and less outside themselves. Everyone is so focused on work and making money that it's like thir whole lives, they don't even notice when someone they know is becoming unhinged. I'm not blaming the individual people here, it's kind of how society as a whole has forced people to become to survive. I think this rampant me-firstness is the root cause of so many problems, even more so than guns. Guns are an effect, not a cause. I'm in favor of gun control because it will make it less easy for deranged people to kill lots of people in a short time, but it's a band-aid trying to cover a gaping wound. People will always turn a blind eye to someone who is 'off.' It's human nature to sweep stuff like that under the rug, pretend it isn't there out of shame, guilt, social pressure, preoccupation with other things, whatever.

Besides that, there's an actual breakdown of society going on. This is the result of schools pushing kids through regardless of grades, behavorial problems, etc, so they can graduate, so the school can have a good record, so they can get MORE MONEY. Anyone else see a common cause of evil here? Maybe if everyone wasn't so damn focused on "getting theirs" we might catch these people before they do horrible things. And, you know, live in a better world and stuff.

Thursday, December 13, 2012

Also!! One of those gawdawful talent reality shows (I don't want to know which one - if I know the name my soul will die) was on last night (we had it on mute* cause we were waiting for another show and are apparently too lazy to change the channel) and Britney Spears was there like, mentoring young singers or something, and I'm like WTF? Britney Spears is some kind of elder statesman of music now? Britney Spears is Paul frigging McCartney?? ASHGFJFKFJDHDHF

*it still hurt my ears somehow

I don't really hate everything in the world right now. It just seems like it sometimes! I'm actually rather lighthearted most of the time. I just really, really miss many things I feel should still be here with us, and I don't like what's replaced them. Writing it down here helps me muddle through.
No store will ever be as cool as Contempo Casuals. I love American Eagle and A&F, but man, sometimes I would trade it all for racks and racks of those flowered babydoll dresses, funky buckle jackets, giant Madonna crucifixes, black velvet hats, and leggings in every shade. Every shade of purple. With the Sundays playing over the speakers. Late 80s/early 90s, kind of the last golden age of the mall. I remember when going to the mall was exciting!!

I had a whole closet full of those flowered dresses, and a canopy bed, and I felt safe.

Monday, December 10, 2012

My fingernails are growing out of control! Why is this happening? Well, I'm glad you asked...

I did not bring my nail scissors with me to Canada because I thought they might see them in my luggage and think it's a weapon and I'd be known as like, the Manicure Terrorist or something for the rest of my life. So now I have to buy new nail scissors. That's like 5 bucks I can't spend on candy! This world sucks butt. :(

...Well not all of it, obviously. Just this kind of thing. Kangeroos don't suck. And trees are pretty great.

Saturday, December 08, 2012

I've been thinking about music a lot lately, or rather, the lack of music. Growing up, popular music was pretty much the center of my life. This was the 80s, of course. I listened to the top 40 on the radio and watched the MTV top 20 video countdown every week religiously. I loved it all. Then, something happened. Well, it stopped being the 80s. That sucked. Music slowly moved away from what I recognized as music. I blame rap, and MTV for taking out the M, and Britney Spears (who never had an ounce of the talent or charisma Madonna had). She and her music have always struck me as plastic. Where's the emotion? Music should not be slick and overly produced, there has to be something raw feeling or it's not music. It's Muzak. And everything is like crazy produced now, they've produced the music right out of it.

And basically, this has made me a completely different person than I used to be, when my life revolved around music. I now avoid popular music instead of breathing it in. It makes me sad that I hate it so much. But I hate it, and I know why I hate it, and I especially hate that kids growing up today think that overly produced crap is what music is supposed to sound like. IT'S NOT. And I hate MTV for abandoning this generation to teen mom and jersey shore and whatever other crap they show now.

Times always change, and I'm sure people back in the like 1800s would be all, MTV? We were happy with a piano and a candle and a... donkey, or whatever. But this is a change I can't accept. I want music back. The great thing about music is it's timeless. I can listen to 80s music or the Beatles or whatever any time I want. But I miss being part of music, part of what's happening. It's more of a security blanket than an adventure. I want to bury myself in a pile of dusty old records, and that seems counter-productive. Heck, that's not even my era, it's my parents'. But records have the most personality, and they smell like something, which is always important.