Feel Good Friday ~ Cage the Elephant

The rest of my music report is coming. Want to listen to a couple more albums first. I let the Sturgill album cut in line. :) But it's really good!

Quarterly State of Music, part one - "No."

I haven't sat down and talked about music for a while, mostly because of the reason mentioned in previous post, but also because -

Current mainstream pop and country is BORING. BORINGBORINGBORING.

I've been busy enjoying some music I actually, y'know, enjoy, which I'll touch on in part two. But let's get the shit out of the way first.

Luke Bryan's new song is called "Huntin', Fishin' and Lovin' Every Day." Aww shit son, someone amped up the "country" to 11!! Damn, and I thought "John Cougar, John Deere, John 3:16" was a cheesy song title.

There's actually a top 10 country song called "Snapback." An ode to a damn hat. Now I miss "Red Solo Cup." It might be an ode to a piece of plastic, but at least you can put a beer in it instead of some bro's douchey head.

The rest of country is either boring AF or actually good, so onto pop.

"Work" - Wow, if this doesn't embody the dull drone that pop music has become, I don't know what does. I can only guess this has stayed at #1 for so long by default, like when you hear an annoying noise for so long you start to tune it out. Like your neighbor's leaf blower. I am officially renaming this song "Leaf Blower." And that's the last I'll ever think of it again. Next!

"7 Years" - Apparently, the way to have a big hit in 2016 is to rip off "100 Years" by Five For Fighting. From 2006. What's next, that "you had a bad day" song?

Zayn is not a name, but I like that it's almost "zany." Haven't heard the song, don't care.

..."Panda?" Somebody wrote an ode to Pablo Sandoval and his belt-exploding gut? Awesome!

Umm this Fifth Harmony bullshit is awful. AWFUL. How did we let this happen?

MIKE FRIGGING POSNER has a top 10 hit, speaking of "how did this happen?" I haven't heard it. The buzz is it's actually not bad, but I heard the same thing about Bieber's current shit. I think my not-bad-o-meter is tuned differently.

Charlie Puth might be the literal worst. WHY is this person famous? My shoes would be a more interesting popstar than this.

And finally... "No." Well, I'll give Meghan Trainor one thing: she's not boring. She gives me solid ranting material pretty much every time. So allow me a moment.

"No" is probably her worst song yet. Yes, I know she did "Dear Future Husband" and "Marvin Gaye." Ironically, "No" is the perfect response to "Let's Marvin Gaye and get it on." But you know what it's not? It's not the "feminist" anthem you probably think it is, Ms. Trainor. See, "feminist" =/= "bitchy." Nor does it equal "controlling" or comparing your sexuality to "a dog without a bone," but we've covered those atrocities already. I don't think I've ever seen anyone try SO hard to be "feminist" and "empowering," fail SO HARD, yet still have so many people buy into it!!!

I don't go to clubs. Never have, except to see a show with a date, or a country bar for line dancing or karaoke. The whole "hook up" scene is as foreign to me as Siberia. I don't even know what "clubbing" entails, exactly. I'm all about music, and club music is shitballs on toast. That said, I understand a woman might want to go out with her friends and not have guys hitting on her. I really do. But, unless the guy's being a total jerk, does it really hurt to turn him down politely, instead of that mean girl crap? Guys are actual humans, you know. And you're not in high school anymore. And bitchiness is not empowering. I don't know where that ever came from. People respecting each other is empowering. Sigh. Okay, let's break this shit down.

"I think it's so cute and I think it's so sweet
How you let your friends encourage you to try and talk to me
But let me stop you there, oh, before you speak"

That's right, she didn't even let him speak. Maybe he wanted to know where the bathroom is! Maybe he wanted to tell her a knock knock joke! Maybe he needed medical attention! But we'll never know now, will we, Meghan. Geesh.

"Nah to the ah to the no, no, no
My name is no
My sign is no
My number is no
You need to let it go
You need to let it go"

Considering you didn't even let him open his mouth, I think you're the one who needs to let it go. He's just standing there, confused and wishing he'd approached literally anyone else. Also he might be bleeding.

"First you gonna say you ain't runnin' game, thinkin' I'm believing every word
Call me beautiful, so original, telling me I'm not like other girls"

But he didn't actually say any of those things. This song is based entirely on assumptions. Look - I don't wanna sound like I'm "blaming the victim" here - but she's not even a victim because the guy didn't even open his mouth and his medical alert bracelet is possibly going off now and GEEZ, if you're really SO DAMN SICK of guys talking to you in clubs, maybe it's time to take a break from going to clubs? Maybe check out the planetarium, or youth night at church? Yes, of course a woman should be able to go anywhere she wants without being harassed, but this song does a damn good job of showing no harassment whatsoever. It's really off point, is what I'm saying. Like I was thinking, "hey, this would actually be interesting if it was a response to the whole "Blurred Lines"* thing - like, "no blurred nothing, just NO." But there's no sleazy guy saying "I know you want it" here. We don't know what he was going to say, we're just meant to assume that GUY = JERK. And that doesn't work. And it sure as HELL isn't "feminism."

*Blurred Lines, a song whose only good lyrics are "woo!" and "hey hey hey."

And that brings us to the most befuddling line of all:

"All my ladies, listen up
If that boy ain't giving up
Lick your lips and swing your hips
Girl all you gotta say is
My name is no"

Umm, speaking of blurred lines? "I don't want a man, so imma do shit that men find alluring just to be a bitch, tee hee!" SCREW. YOU. And finally -

"I was in my zone, before you came along, don't want you to take this personal"

How could he take it personal? He didn't even say anything! If he does though, maybe it's because you're jumping down his throat like a spoiled, catty teenager. "Don't take this personal" is the "Nah, I'm just playin!" of this song. It's meant to soften the edge, say "see I'm not a total bitch!" but it does just the opposite by being so obviously transparent.

A woman, a person, has every right to say no in any situation. But it's also natural for men to approach women, and not get a reaction like it's the most offensive thing EVAR!!!1OMGCOOTIES!1! I exist because my dad talked to my mom in a bar. There's a biological imperative here, is what I'm saying. Let's all just respect each other, and maybe you'll even end up meeting someone nice. Or not. But there's nothing wrong with keeping an open mind, even just a little. Sheesh, I never thought I'd miss "Call Me Maybe." But at least "maybe" sounds a bit more mature than "NOPE. NOPENOPENOPENEOPE. *sticks fingers in ears* lalallaala I can't hear you but I'm gonna shake my hips at you neenerneener!" Seriously, fuck this song. YOU JUST MADE ME SAY "CALL ME MAYBE" IS MATURE BY COMPARISON FUCK.

Meghan Trainor just keeps cementing her position of everything I hate about young women today. Come on girls, you're better than this. Really think about what she's saying, not just how the shallow "empowerment" makes you feel. Because it's designed to make you feel, not think. Which can be fine in pop music. But this isn't even well done, there's zero substance here; it's the Bratz doll of empowerment. Yeah, I'm probably reading too much into a stupid pop song. But it's what I do. Sigh. And like it or not, popular music does affect culture.

Oh, the sound of the song. Well, she's moved away from the 60s into a... late 90s-early/mid 2000s pop/r&b vibe? Like Destiny's Child kinda? Which isn't necessarily bad, but man does she not pull it off. Meghan Trainor is not Beyoncé. Yeah, you heard it here first. Nothing but bold statements on this blog, folks. But yeah. Bringing that sound back could be a breath of fresh air on the charts, but not this way. This is awful, and already a candidate for my worst hit song of the year.

But, at least she's not boring. *coughRihannacough*

Feel Good Friday - Crash Kings + Paramore

I haven't posted in a while. Nice weather + baseball season = welcome respite from social media.

These songs played back to back on my walk yesterday, which put me in a good mood for the rest of the day. (The Jays beating the Yankees contributed to that as well.) ;)

I might have used this one before, but it's one of the best songs I've ever heard. Seriously, a shot of pure happy energy.



One of my favorite, and most underrated, Paramore songs. I like this better than any of their hits.

Walking Dead season finale

I've seen a lot of criticism of TWD's cliffhanger finale, and it's both deserved and not deserved IMO.

The episode itself was great. Full of tension and suspense and everything you'd want it to be. I felt the cliffhanger was actually earned in this episode, both in the buildup and by it being a season finale.

If anything cheapened the episode, it was the Glenn fakeout earlier in the season, which was easily the worst thing the show has done. And also whatever the heck happened with Daryl the previous week. They've gone to that well so many times now that even when it is earned, it feels cheap. Which is too bad, because I thought it was a strong episode. Basically the criticism is justified not for the finale itself, but for the season overall. So I will just take it for what it is, and hope they save the cliffhangers for truly pivotal episodes in the future.

As a SPN fan, I'm still adjusting to evil John Winchester. JDM is making it a pretty easy sell though. Damn. I need to watch some season two SPN to feel warm and fuzzy about him again. Fun side note: JDM is only 11 years older than Jensen Ackles, and 16 years older than Jared Padalecki.

I think Negan's victim has to be either Daryl or Michonne. Most articles I've read narrowed it down to those two or Glenn, but apparently Glenn was his victim in the books so I seriously doubt they'd do that. It could be Daryl after the fakeout last week. Michonne would be more of a surprise, and also a horrible gut punch to Rick. We know that it's not Rick or Carl from what Negan said, but what if it's the woman who's basically been Carl's mom for several seasons and now Rick's partner? Feels like foreshadowing? I hope I'm wrong because I really like Michonne, but I'd also have to give the show props for killing off a main character.

Also? I'm glad they stated it would be a character "beloved" by many, cause I've been worried Eugene was gonna die this whole season and I'm pretty sure he's only beloved by me lol.

It's gonna be a long 6 months.

Feel good Friday, zombie edition

You know an odd reason I think Walking Dead works so well? It's timeless. It doesn't pander to any demographic, because by its nature, it really can't. It appeals to a wide audience because it's life boiled down to its essence. There are no trends, no buzzwords, nothing that will make it seem dated as fuck in 5 years, in a world where things are dated increasingly faster all the time. There's nothing in it to alienate any group of people, except those who are turned off by zombies eating guts, of course. By not trying to be cool, it's adopted a very timeless sense of cool. This is why the original Night of the Living Dead still works too.

People are kind of more interesting in a zombie apocalypse, is what I guess I'm saying. They're trying to find their humanity rather than escape from it. As scary as it is, I enjoy watching the simplicity of that world.

And I'm scared as hell what's gonna happen this week. :(

Also, they play some DAMN good music.

TBT - Janet Jackson

Janet Jackson rocks out, and it's awesome. I still listen to this song all the time.

Silly Headline of the Day

"Racine, Wisconsin: 17-Year-Old Girl Unexpectedly Gives Birth in Bathroom"

I'm not familiar with the customs of Racine, Wisconsin, but does anyone plan to give birth in a bathroom?

TBT - Gonna drive past the Stop n Shop, with the radio on

Sometimes I miss New England. This is one of those times. So here's a classic, ahead of its time rock song featuring one of my favorite riffs.



In other news, I seem to have lost the will to snark on terrible music. Is it because mainstream music, especially country, has gone from egregiously bad to so egregiously BORING there's nothing to say about it anymore? Is it because what's going on in the rest of the world makes the latest Florida Georgia Line song look piddling, on a scale of piddling to OMFG WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE?? Or did 3 Justin Bieber songs in the top 5 at once finally break my spirit? Who can say.

What I can say is, I'm listening to a lot of good music. Mostly rock. Spring has arrived early. St. Patty's Day is almost here. Maybe sanity will prevail and we won't all die. At least, not any time soon. So for the near future, I'll probably just do sporadic Thursday and Friday posts, unless a brand new musical plague hits that I can rant about. I... probably shouldn't hope for that.

Cheers!

Can every day be Throwback Thursday?

Throwback to when, I don't care. Just anywhere but here.

Well, let's start here. "In 1983, 90% of US media was controlled by fifty companies; today, 90% is controlled by just six companies."

That sentence is relevant to pretty much everything horrible that is happening right now, from music to politics to pop culture in general. The same corporate media responsible for today's shitty radio also helped create the Trump monster. This is a HUGE problem. When our media is no longer concerned with facts, reason or quality but only the bottom line of $$$, this is what happens. Bro-country, Kardashians, Trump, it's all the same junk product peddled by media desperate for our money. DON'T BUY IT. Maybe it was funny and stupidly entertaining for a while, but this is the end game. This is how media control becomes dangerous.

So let's go back to 1983, and my favorite song of a truly classic year in music. The day Chrissie Hynde's voice stops making me cry wistful tears of joy is the day I'm truly dead inside. I'm happy to report, I'm not dead yet.

TBT

A throwback... to when I actually used to post on this blog! Yeah, I haven't really been doing the social media thing with all the political crap everywhere. Politics is so inherently spammy. Just endless ads for a product that doesn't even work. NO THANK YOU. Instead, I shall re-bingewatch Gilmore Girls, because why not, and listen to some good ol' 90s tunes.



I love Beck. My favorite song of his, off an album that sounds even more fresh and relevant now than it did in the 90s. An album that combines elements of rock, pop, country, hip hop, and electronic music, and it's FANTASTIC.



I love Brooks and Dunn. Yeah, I sure do miss you. :( And most of the other 90s country acts too. That was just the best time.



I love Weezer. And they're making some of the best music of their career right now! To end this on a positive note. :) I still miss the 90s though.

AWESOME Yahoo Headline of the Day

"Discarded Christmas Trees Transformed Into an Ethereal Forest"

Beautiful and kind of eerie.

https://www.yahoo.com/makers/discarded-christmas-trees-transformed-ethereal-212032864/photo-a-new-home-for-your-1452635742726.html

New music Tuesday

From their 2015 debut album, here's some lush, jangly, 90s-esque girlypop from Wolf Alice.

Stupid clickbaity headline of the day

"12 Archaeological Finds You Won’t Believe Were Found On Earth"

I will though, since I'm pretty sure "space archaeology" doesn't actually exist as a field.

Something to think about

If an artist like David Bowie emerged today, what would happen? Would he still become an international superstar by sheer force of talent and personality, or would he be relegated to indie icon by the music industry that squeezes the creative life out of everything?

I'm glad Bowie's star was able to shine so bright. There will never be another like him, but I hope future artists with a similar spark will still be able to find an audience. Imagine a world without these classic artists. We might have already lost a Bowie, McCartney, etc. level talent in all the computer-generated noise. We might have lost several. My hope today is that organic music, created by musicians rather than studios looking for a quick buck and things that need to be plugged in to have a soul, can keep living on.

Remember. This is what we might be missing. This is what's at stake. Don't let the classics exist in a vacuum of "the good old days." Another legend is gone. Let's honor his memory by honoring music, the kind of music that comes from an intangible place inside the creator and is theirs alone. Music that is created rather than programmed. It can be acoustic, it can be electronic, as long as it comes from the opposite of cynicism.

Worthless Yahoo Headline of the Day

um.

"John Stamos Talks Rehab and Surprise Pregnancy"

...what kind of rehab was that, exactly?

TBT

For today's throwback Thursday, I'm gonna talk about something that clearly belongs in the throwback category - self-empowerment songs! With the near-universal negative critical reception of "Fight Song," as well as the dull "Roar" a couple years ago*, I think this well has pretty much run dry. Exactly how many times can you say, "NO, I'm awesome, take THAT!" and make it sound fresh?

*remember when you were a kid enjoying some sweet tunes in your room and your mom asked you to keep it down to a "dull roar?" Yeah. And that was definitely not the sweet tune you were listening to.

Let's start in the 1970s. One could ask the question, did we really need any song like this other than "I Will Survive?" Doesn't that kinda say everything, while also sounding ridiculously awesome? Well... here are a handful of other empowerment anthems I actually find worthy. This is just off the top of my head, no research this time so if I forgot something, maybe I'll revisit it.

The Greatest Love of All - Whitney Houston was amazing. She was my favorite artist for a time, because I've always been about vocals. This song nails it not so much because of the melody or lyrics, which could sound trite in the hands of a lesser vocalist, but because Whitney owns the shit out of this. Like she did everything in the 80s.

Eye of the Tiger - Not so much an empowerment anthem as a kickass rock song, but it's from a Rocky movie and there are like, none of these songs sung by men, so I'll take it. And it sure gets you pumped up. Just ask Dean Winchester.



My favorite thing in the world, ladies and gentlemen.

One Way Ticket - LeAnn Rimes - I like this one because it focuses on something different, and rather specific: I'm going to have adventures! I'm not just going to feel good about me, I'm gonna do it in... Paris! or wherever. Drink champagne! Sail the seas! Arrrrr! This song doesn't just say "hey, I can do things," it lists actual things you can do. You go, girl!

Born This Way - A gay empowerment anthem from Lady Gaga, because duh. Obviously it can appeal to more than just gays, but this is a rare one of these songs I could actually see saving someone's life, or at least cheering someone up if they're getting bullied or something.

Follow Your Arrow - Another smart and modern take on being yourself. Some people might be put off by the pot and lesbian references, especially in country music, but it clearly speaks to its audience. I neither roll joints nor kiss girls, and I dig the hell out of this. Because I drink wine and kiss cats. I'm following my arrow. Yeah!

Firework - This one borders on generic territory, but Katy Perry saves it. Her voice can be underwhelming at times, as I pointed out on Roar, but she brings a real power and intensity to this song that's undeniable. That said, this is the last pop song like this we ever needed. Katy closed out this chapter with um, a bang. (sorry.)

AND YET, we still got "What Doesn't Kill You Makes You Stronger," which I thought would be the worst, most generic example until "Song Song," I mean Fight Song came along. (First rule about Fight Song: don't talk about Fight Song. Seriously, there's nothing to say about it. Go read a book or something.) And that's a shame, because Kelly Clarkson is both a great vocalist and a likeable artist. But not even she could save, "You know the bed feels warmer sleeping here alone" - WHY? Did you move it next to the fireplace? Is your cat sleeping on your head? - or "You think you got the best of me, think you had the last laugh" MUAHAHAHA! MINE IS AN EVIL LAUGH! God, I hate that song. And Fight Song one-upped it. Or... one-downed it. Whatever.

Oh yeah, "Shake it Off" is in a whole other category, cause it's not really a self-empowerment song, it's a Taylor Swift-specific-empowerment song. It's pretty bad, but it's catchy and harmless, so whatever. I can't work up much hate for Taylor Swift, if anything I like her more since she dropped the country shell and went full pop. THAT is kind of empowering, to be honest.

So, since this kind of song is clearly played out, where do we go from here? Well, I like the idea of more specific themes. Maybe not "empowerment" songs, per se, but... let's look at two interesting, personal songs from 2015.

Kacey Musgraves' Pageant Material - I wouldn't call this an empowerment song, more of a humorous slice of life with a message, but the message is an empowering one. "I ain't pageant material... I'd rather lose for what I am than win for what I ain't."

Alessia Cara's Here - This is almost an anti-empowerment song ("I HATE THIS PLACE AND EVERYONE IN IT") and yet... well, it kind of is empowering for us introverts and other people who don't like loud, stupid parties and just want to hang out with the people we actually like. It's empowering because people just don't say stuff like this, usually. The introvert narrative just isn't out there. So for people who find this song empowering by way of being relatable, I get it.

And that's what I think the future is. Relatable songs using specific anecdotes, rather than broad platitudes we've heard a million times before. Bring something new to the table, and you might actually change someone's life for the better instead of putting them to sleep. Unless the person is an insomniac, then awesome, you solved their problem.

Oops, I missed New Music Tuesday. Well it's Wednesday, and here's some music. I'm a rebel.

Eric Church is an artist I haven't mentioned much, other than I really like "Springsteen." He's someone I feel like I should be into more, but just hasn't pulled me in. He's obviously a talented musician, he probably listens to a lot of cool stuff, but most of his songs just leave me wanting. I don't know if his own conceit got in the way, or he was trying to straddle mainstream and indie and not really succeeding at either, or just hadn't found his groove, or whatever. That said, I've only heard his singles, so I understand he might have good album material. But until Mr. Misunderstood, I was never inclined to check out one of his albums.



How can I describe this song, besides "it's really good?" Well, this is pretty much what I wanted Eric Church to be. Finally, a single that doesn't fall short of his artistic perception. He definitely went with the "indie" side, and that was 100% the right choice. It suits him, and it's just damn good music. Because he's an established radio artist, I imagine this will get some airplay. I don't know how much play it will get since it's clearly too good for radio, or if it will resonate with mainstream listeners. But I applaud Eric Church for putting quality music out there, and this song and album will have much more lasting appeal than the latest Luke Bryan dropping, in the long run. That's the sign of a musician, an artist. I never thought he was a "poser" like some seemed to, but this is the first I've heard him live up to his potential. This is that perfect mix of country and heartland rock I was waiting for.

I hope this at least cracks the top 20, so I can put it on my best hit songs list of 2016. It's only January 6, but I guarantee this song is a shoo-in. I love it. EDIT: Mr. Misunderstood is currently at #17. Hot damn, pencil it in. I've only just started processing the album so I don't have all my favorites down yet, but I can tell you it's rich, textured, smart, and deserving of many listens.



Church's album is the first country album I've listened to in a while, since Ashley Monroe's excellent The Blade (which I got to late). I've definitely been more on a rock kick, especially alt-rock lately. I needed a break from country. (Though surprisingly, Church's album fits right in with my alt-rock mood. It's a cool, indie record store kind of album. In the good, non-pretentious way.)

The album that kind of took over my life when I first heard it last month is Weezer's 2014 release, Everything Will Be Alright in the End. First of all, what a great title. It might as well have "Don't Panic" written on it in large, friendly letters. Second, the title doesn't lie. After a string of mediocre to almost bad albums, Weezer came back BIG TIME here. Like, this might have actually unseated Maladroit as my favorite Weezer album. (Maladriot is hard to beat, as it's basically Weezer catchiness set to hard crunchy rock music.)

If you like Weezer, especially their classic early stuff, Everything Will Be Alright will probably be one of your favorite albums of the past few years. It's definitely one of mine. Just one great, catchy song after another, from "Back to the Shack" to "Lonely Girl" to "The British are Coming" to "Foolish Father" to the burst of an opening track "Ain't Got Nobody" and my personal favorite "Go Away," with Best Coast's Bethany Cosentino. (Which I posted previously.) Pure OMG sonic yumminess.







I lost the thread of Weezer post-Maladriot (I guess you could say, I came undone) since I didn't care for anything off Make Believe other than the ubiquitous "Perfect Situation." That's actually a great song. I gave brief listens to the unremarkable albums they released between that and Everything, and came up with only one song I really liked, off of Hurley. But wow, what an awesome song. This would fit right in on Everything. Despite a few missteps, I count Rivers Cuomo as one of the top songwriters of my generation.



So there you go, two unrelated artists who have expanded my musical happiness lately!

Worthless Yahoo Headline of the Day

"MIRANDA LAMBERT: TWEET LIKED BY GWEN STEFANI, ALTHOUGH GWEN STILL DOESN’T FOLLOW HER"

LIKE OMG YOU GUYS!! Hurray, apparently both Gwen and Miranda are more mature than the people who write Yahoo news headlines, who are clearly twelve. (I'm not betting the farm on Blake, though. Seriously, how does that corny doofball get these amazing women?)

I hate when celebs I love become tabloid fodder. Miranda might be the first one. I wish her happiness, dignity, and great music in her new relationship.

"Rudolph, the red-nosed reindeer
had a very shiny nose
and if you ever saw it
you would even say it glows.
All of the other reindeer
used to laugh and call him names
They never let poor Rudolph
join in any reindeer games.

Then one foggy Christmas eve
Santa came to say:
'Rudolph with your nose so bright,
won't you guide my sleigh tonight?'
THEN all the reindeer loved him
Cuz reindeer are dicks."

THE END of the holidays!! HAPPY NEW BEER!!! (a new year is just a date on the calendar, but a new beer is a thing of beauty.)

I don't make resolutions, I make threats. Don't suck, 2016, or I'll knock you back into 2015, so help me.

I really dislike Meghan Trainor. Not just her musical output, but the persona she's created: every stereotype that's made me avoid so-called "chick culture."

But proving the blind squirrel theory right, her latest single "Like I'm Gonna Lose You," a duet with John Legend, is actually really nice. Part of it is John Legend classing it up; John Legend could class up a gas station men's room. But a lot of it is the song itself. This song could easily be reworked into a classic country duet, it already has a kind of country-soul vibe. If any country stars wanted to jump on its popularity, I sure wouldn't complain. Maybe, idk, Miranda Lambert & Chris Stapleton? Cause that would just KILL EVERYTHING. In the good way.

Meghan is the weakest part of the song. Her voice is fine, nothing special but I don't think it's awful like a lot of people seem to. It's more what she sings that annoys me than the sound of her voice, except when she gets really strident. But that's persona again, not lack of vocal capability. So here on a non-annoying song, she's actually listenable for once, if not great. Where I could see someone like Miranda, or maybe Cam, just setting this song on fire with smooth, sultry vocals, Meghan Trainor is not "sultry." Meghan Trainor always sounds like she's aggressively trying to sell you Girl Scout cookies. She's toned down here, but that's just it: it's "toned down Meghan Trainor," not the kind of true subtlety, depth, or emotion that would give the song its deserved poignancy. John Legend is a much better fit. He has a gorgeous voice that's often wasted on dull, middle of the road stuff like "All of Me." I hate when super talented artists do "safe" material. Nobody wants to hear Aretha Franklin cover Pat Boone, you know?

So yeah, I'll give credit where it's due. Mostly to John Legend and some really nice songwriting, but I can actually say I like a Meghan Trainor song. Maybe she'll tone down her act with maturity and become a more likable, well-rounded artist. I do think she has some potential. And speaking of potential... make the country duet of this song happen. It'll work with the right people, I guarantee it.