Awesome quote on a youtube video about an abandoned spot in New Jersey:

"Great video! I live near the Jersey shore, there's nothing abandoned here :/"

Haha, I'm sure you wish there was... Finally someone who appreciates urban decay over cultural decay. :P

Also, I want to be a ghosthunter. I have absolutely NO FEAR. Except of people who might try to control me, or judge me, or be giant jerkfaces. But ghosts? Heck yeah, I wanna see one! Though with my luck I'd meet a giant jerkface ghost. ;p

Sooo my first "real" intrepid foray into urban exploring (with my intrepid disposable camera) was not exactly a success. Mainly due to the location being in a much more unsavory area than I remembered it being in. It's a shame too, because it looked really cool. I managed to take a couple shots from a distance before I was chased away, one of the iconic WINDMILL. I pray to the deity of disposable cameras (and failing that, the deity of abandoned miniature golf courses) that it at least comes out, or it was a complete washout.

Am I giving up? Hell no. I'm sad my first endeavor was mostly FAIL though. :/ I'm trying to just savor the awesomeness of the WINDMILL and shoot the rest into space with the bits of old telescopes and space junk.

Otherwise, it was a fantastic day at the Redondo Pier and El Segundo. Entry with rad disposable camera shots to come, once I get them developed. I would like a nice camera btw, especially a digital one. I just don't want to have to talk about it all the time. ;p

Here's something I like.



Tom Waits is the PERFECT music to describe abandoned houses. Abandoned things tend to evoke tom-waits-type feelings in me even without the musical accompaniment so... wow. His music is like late at night when you don't really want to go to bed but you turn out the light and it's dark and you're alone but you're smiling a little at a memory. It's always there, it always speaks to you, it's always right. It's not hip or unhip, it just IS, like a river or a shot of whiskey. His music is what the absence of artifice sounds like.

I could go on and on but... yeah. I really like this video and how sad and happy it makes me feel. One of those youtube gems that makes me feel less alone in this crazy world of action.

Also: in every abandoned building there is always a musty, decrepit piano like out of a scooby doo cartoon. Don't ask me why this is. Well, other than the obvious pianos are big heavy suckers and not exactly the first thing you're gonna grab on your way out. But still! So many pianos! In weird places like abandoned factories! Why would you put a piano in a factory? This brings to mind so many wonderful images, all of them involving burly workers spontaneously bursting into numbers from Oklahoma on their lunch breaks. This happened. Yes, I have decided that this happened.

A cool video of a guy exploring a "lost city," who says pretty much everything I feel about the past, present and future.

So in light of my last couple posts, I'm stopping right here and backing this blog up. From now on I'm focusing on the AWESOME in life. (Well, except T&T, cause it's AWESOMELY AWFUL.) While working on my "search for sanity" post, I was watching all these awesome videos. And it hit me like a rather obvious ton of bricks. This stuff isn't just escapism... this is the sweet sweet valley of sanity. Taking what you love and DOING something with it, instead of doing what THE MAN says you should do. Tee hee... THE MAN. I apparently now live in the 60s and smoke lots of weed.

Anyway. This guy, Adam the Woo, is my favorite. If anyone reads this thing ever, check out his site! Warning: may cause sleep deprivation. http://adamthewoo.tumblr.com/ One of my favorite things about this guy is he never seems to have a flashlight. That would so be me. "OOH DARK CREEPY PLACE! *RUN RUN FLAIL* CAN'T WAIT... oh. In my excitement I seem to have forgotten my flashlight, can I borrow yours?"

What this guy was doing last week while I was watching T&T:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wzpAQxt6h3c&feature=youtu.be

Yeah, I suck. But I suck slightly less for having watched this. I'm gonna donate to him and suggest a few cool spots if he ever comes out west. You know, I used to think I was so weird for liking stuff like this. Yay internet for making me feel less weird! Side note: why does it seem like people on the internet and people in real life are like, totally different people? When I express an interest in something "off the beaten track" to someone I meet in person, I get the 0_o face. But online, there are hundreds of people going "yeah me too that's awesome!" I guess it's just easier to find like-minded people online. Man, I wish "real life" could be more like that. Not that the internet isn't "real life," it's not like you're transported to the Magical Land of Oz while you're online... lol.

These guys are cool too! They're like the kings of awesome crumbly structures. http://stuffthatsgone.com/

Obviously I wanna explore stuff myself, not just watch other people doing it. I have done this every chance I've gotten though sadly, I don't own a camera so it's just for my own enjoyment. I think what really renewed my interest was last year, when I lived in Colorado and went to Lakeside Amusement Park (an awesomely old and NOT abandoned place), and saw the long-abandoned Lakeside Speedway sitting next to it. Even from the outside, this thing is INSANELY awesome and creepy. I wanted in so bad, but all I could do was peer through some cracks in the wall. I always meant to go back by myself and see if I could find a way in. But even just walking the exterior is cool. I got a FEELING when I was close to it, not exactly a "this place is haunted" feeling but a "something strange happened here" feeling. When I got home I immediately looked it up online and there it was... it closed in 1988 after a spectator was killed. I didn't see any reports of it being haunted, but if you're receptive to certain feelings like I am, there is a major cool creepy vibe there.



I did not take this rad photo.

After staring through those cracks like a kid at a candy store window, I was reluctantly pulled away and back to the "real world." There was nothing more to see. But for me there was. I could have stood there a lot longer, just soaking it in. It was then I realized I have an odd kind of sensitivity that most people don't have, or have to a much lesser extent. I'm not sure how to explain it. I'm not psychic, I don't see ghosts, but I feel "attuned" to things, both visible and not, well beyond the point that other people would say "I'm boooooooored." I think I'd be good at exploring because I have no fear (within reason, I wouldn't do anything stupid). I have no fear because I love being creeped out.

I will leave you with this because it is literally my favorite thing ever. Creepy burnt ruins AND my sense of humor! Oh this guy also shares my love for weird roadside attractions, Disney parks, and old B horror movies. I wonder if he's a MSTie too. And he eschews the consumer grind by living in his van and going on adventures. Swell! I think he's my brother from another mother. or something that sounds less stupid.



I just typed "nipples flying everywhere!" to my fiance. (He works in a warehouse. There are metal doohickeys called nipples. I don't ask too many questions.)

There are two kinds of people in this world.



Those who see something like this and run away screaming, and those who see it and run towards it... screaming. I am the latter. "This" is an image from an abandoned theme park called Dogpatch USA in Arkansas that I actually went to as a child. No it isn't a dead body, just a dead hillbilly dummy (photo from undergroundozarks.com, which is a cool site).

I've always had a love for the past. Not history like wars and who was king of Austria in 1702 or whatever crap you're forced to memorize in school, but modern history. Personal history. Towns, buildings, people, stories. For example, what happened in Centralia, PA. Sad, creepy, and endlessly fascinating.

Again... two kinds of people.



OOH CRACKED HIGHWAY WITH SATAN COMING OUT OF IT... MUST GET CLOSER!

I've also always had a love for odd and unique things. One of my favorite places growing up, as much as I remember because I was so young, was the Old Towne Mall in Torrance, CA. This was not an ordinary mall, more like a small town carnival. It had this fairy tale kind of dark ride in it that I can barely remember the details of, yet the atmosphere is one of the most lingering memories of my childhood. It was magical, in all its low-budget glory. It's also long, long gone. I've searched the internet for years for any images of this ride, but none seem to exist. A lot of people who have similar memories of it to this day, and some great photos of the mall itself, but not that one thing from my childhood I want back. It's sort of become my Holy Grail. In my perfect world, this mall and this ride would still be there. Instead, it is a strip mall. In my dreams, the fairy tale ride and its inhabitants still sit, untouched for 25 years, behind the wall of the Best Buy or whatever it is now, waiting to be discovered.



I still remember exactly what this place smelled like - caramel corn, cotton candy, and FUN!

I've also always had a love for abandoned things. As a child I remember being drawn to old ruins, caves, empty houses (I even have a picture of me on a camping trip in Utah or someplace when I was about 6, building my own "ruin" out of rocks for me and my dolls to live in. :D) Old bridges, aqueducts, lighthouses, railroad tracks and trestles, any kind of random structure, crumbling or just old and interesting captures my imagination. And the internet is full of seriously cool people who feel the same way and make cool stuff out of it!

~ continued next post

Soooooo

I was writing up a post entitled "the sweet sweet valley of sanity," about how things seem to be going to these ridiculous mountains of extremes and my search for, well, the sweet sweet valley of sanity. It occurred to me that I mostly write about stuff I don't like on here, and my only really "fun" posts are my T&T posts, which I also don't like but at least I can snark the crap out of. It's weird because I'm really not a negative person, more of a walking MST, taking life's absurdities with a sort of non-aggressive mocking stance.

The reasons for this negativity are my SA obviously, and how this place serves as a refuge when I'm feeling particularly wretched. Maybe not so fun to read, but therapeutic. But beyond that there is what I see as the growing negativity in the world, which was exacerbated by my ill-fated interest in politics. We have a generation coming up that relates to the world through text messages and tweets and I wonder, do they feel the world? Do they ever think about where they came from, what's around them? I see humans becoming more desensitized and less connected every day. The world is always changing, and there have been some fantastic advances in the last 30 years, socially and technologically, that I wouldn't change for anything. But there are also really noticeable and disturbing changes that have taken place since I was a child that I don't think are beneficial or even natural.

Chiefly ~ the strip mallification of America. We've always had chain stores and there's nothing wrong with them, but it wasn't always like this. Everywhere you go in this country it's exactly the same, the same handful of stores that have driven out the unique regional culture. I mean, the only way you can even tell where you are anymore is what kind of trees are growing there.* Sometimes I come upon one of these monstrosities and I feel claustrophobic, I actually can't breathe. These big companies are strangling the life out of this country, and nobody seems to care. I mean when I was a kid we shopped at the "big" stores sometimes, but we also shopped at other places for variety. I guess somewhere along the line, people stopped doing that. They said fuck it, I wanna get tires and chewing gum and lawn furniture at the same damn place, every single day, no surprises, no soul, no problem. In and out and back home to watch tv and go to bed for another day of supporting the endless grind. Do they ever wonder what else is out there? Do they ever remember how things used to be, what still lies beneath the plastic surface?

*on the bright side, at least there are still trees.

The thing is, I think most people forget their childhood. They disregard it as something to "move on from." And with each generation, even children have less and less true childhood wonder (the kind that isn't manufactured in Japan). I think adults should celebrate their childhoods without shame, not in a way that's dwelling on the past but keeping alive what's important and interesting NOW, and preserving it for the future. This is what we are losing, our sense of preservation. Somewhere along the line, everything started becoming disposable. This is not progress, this is waste.

So, I will write my sweet sweet valley of sanity post another time, and end with this before my next post of STUFF THAT MAKES ME HAPPY DAMMIT. The reason I'm becoming so enamored with abandoned places (and other people who appreciate them) is not only because it's fun and creepy and damn interesting to explore the past but because it makes me feel less alone in my sensibilities. Other people are drawn to something besides what's presented to them as a consumer, other people CARE. And mostly, to preserve these things in some way before they're swept away forever to become something soulless and counter-intuitive to humanity like an office park.

Sure, looking at cool things in a state of decay can be sad, but at least it's an interesting kind of sad. It makes you think. It makes you feel. And somehow, they seem more alive and less decayed than the Everytown Big Store Consumer Depots of Hell. The old remnants are somehow alive, their souls remain. They speak to me. I also find them beautiful and sometimes, oddly, positive. It's less about what's gone than what's still there, the ruins and the memories.

Maybe it's sad that exploring the past has become more appealing in some ways than the present, but one astute Youtube commenter said it best in a video entitled "Last Day at Kiddieland" (which is pretty much also the title of my life), about the closing of a beloved children's amusement park. From the description: "Started in 1929, the suburban Chicago Kiddieland survived the Great Depression, a World War and countless other challenges only to fall to a family dispute. One small branch of the family wanted to sell the land. The other, larger branch wanted to keep the park alive. Money won. Doesn't it always? Another big box retailer, a Wal-Mart or a Costco or something similar will replace Kiddieland..."

Commenter: you know....what made america, america is slowly dissapearing

Yeah... that's pretty much my whole post in one amazing sentence. Did that leave anyone else feeling gut-punched and winded like it did me? This is actually HAPPENING, and it's happening less and less slowly as we become more and more fast-paced and disposable and me me me and now now now and more more more. I mean, my favorite song "Big Yellow Taxi" was written in 1970. Before I was born. The warning signs were there even 40 years ago, but instead of paying attention we've just let more and more iconic things die. And for WHAT? For NOTHING! For profit, which means absolutely nothing in a world with nothing left to spend it on but... more profit. "If I die with the most crap, I win the world's biggest and most pointless game of Monopoly!"

These things that make up the fabric of our country are not things you trade in like a car or a computer. They don't need an upgrade, they're fine the way they are. And when they're gone, they're gone forever. And so is an important piece of who we are.

What makes humans, human is slowly disappearing.