So I've given myself the task of writing a song called "Asshole in a Truck." It will be loosely based on all the "jacked up truck" country songs, but mostly my impressions of young, pickup drivin' males here in Edmonton. Y'know, the kind who've never hauled anything in their truck bed except the "dates" they keep bound and gagged and have license plates reading "badazz?" Maybe some charming artwork on the back depicting flames or skulls or, I dunno, ACTUAL WOMEN WHO HAVE BEEN BOUND AND GAGGED?

This is a real thing, folks. And there was more than one image like this, I had to PICK one. It's official, reality has become worse than my snark. I give up.

I'm still writing that song, though. I'll probably leave that part out of it.

Every time I see clips from one of the Republican debates, I think it's an SNL sketch. Seriously. That's how bad these people are.

Republican debate-goers have ramped up the repulsion even further. What's worse than cheering executions or sick people dying? How about openly booing an ACTIVE DUTY SOLDIER IN IRAQ who happens to be gay? Americans booing our own troops, this is where we're at. I don't like it when war protesters ("my side" politically, usually) do it and I sure as hell don't like it when the rah rah war bumper sticker crowd does it. "Support our troops... except that guy!" AWESOME FOLKS. WAY TO BREAK YOUR PREVIOUS WORLD RECORD IN DOUCHERY. And be sure to cheer real loud if the "queer" dies serving his country for your ignorant redneck lazyboy sitting tea party asses. You obviously like that sort of thing. I FUCKING HATE YOU.

And not one candidate stepped up and said, "Whoa this guy's in fucking IRAQ, have a little respect, you douchebags." No "thank you for your service," like a PRESIDENT would say, like Obama would say to anyone serving. Once again, the utter immaturity and carelessness of these people is staggering. This is not leadership. This is not the Republican party I could respectfully disagree with. This is the guy who pours blood into the shark pool. This is a party about egging on. And those who don't incite, someone actually serious like Romney? HE DID NOTHING. Not exactly virtues that come to mind when I think "Presidential." And that's our field, a stage full of Americans who couldn't even be arsed to defend a soldier who's out there defending them. UNFUCKINGBELIEVABLE.

That it is now, apparently, worse political suicide as a Republican to be seen defending a gay man than NOT defending our troops is staggering in itself. I don't even know what to say anymore. I feel like I'm in some bizarre futuristic universe right before the world gets destroyed. And the last living person will be like Jean-Claude Van Damme or someone, and he'll ride a motorcycle down the deserted highway with a scrap of newspaper blowing moodily by, and that'll be how the world ends.